Author Topic: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down  (Read 1718 times)

Offline stromboli

"Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« on: September 14, 2015, 01:54:42 PM »
http://www.ourladyofperpetualexemption.com/#

Quote
Praise Be Unto You
September 13, 2015

It is I, Megareverend and C.E.O. of Our Lady of Perpetual Exemption Church, Pastor John Oliver.

We thank you for all your kind donations, but I’m sorry to report that we have closed down the church. And let me take a moment to explain why - it’s certainly not because we have to.

We have still, miraculously, not broken any laws by promising you untold riches in return for sending us money. We’re also not closing down because you all kept sending us actual seeds, even though we explicitly told you not to. We’re closing because multiple people sent us sperm through the mail. And when someone sends you jizz through the mail, it’s time to stop whatever you’re doing.

So we are shutting this s**t down. Praise be!
 

P.S. All previous monetary donations have been forwarded to Doctors Without Borders

Shame on you, you sick minded bastards  :naughty:

Offline Baruch

Re: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2015, 01:56:18 PM »
You have to be willing to commit to the next two millennia, or you aren't serious ... says any Catholic Pope.
Ha’át’íísh baa naniná?
Azee’ ła’ish nanídį́į́h?
Táadoo ánít’iní.
What are you doing?
Are you taking any medications?
Don't do that.

Offline Solitary

Re: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« Reply #2 on: September 14, 2015, 02:02:40 PM »
Can you still return to sender? What's next, a letter bomb?
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.

Offline TomFoolery

Re: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2015, 02:03:41 PM »
Ha ha. Send us your "seed."

How can you be sure my refusal to agree with your claim a symptom of my ignorance and not yours?

Offline Baruch

Re: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« Reply #4 on: September 14, 2015, 02:05:20 PM »
Can you still return to sender? What's next, a letter bomb?

Biological weapons in the mail ... are an FBI/Army specialty [-C
Ha’át’íísh baa naniná?
Azee’ ła’ish nanídį́į́h?
Táadoo ánít’iní.
What are you doing?
Are you taking any medications?
Don't do that.

Offline Solitary

Re: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« Reply #5 on: September 14, 2015, 02:22:33 PM »
They work pretty good in New York subways too.
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.

Offline dtq123

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Re: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« Reply #6 on: September 15, 2015, 01:19:55 AM »
Praise the Flying Spaghetti Monster for smiting false idols!  :fsm:
A dark cloud looms over.
Festive cheer does not help much.
What is this, "Justice?"

Offline drunkenshoe

Re: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« Reply #7 on: September 15, 2015, 04:04:58 AM »
Quote
P.S. All previous monetary donations have been forwarded to Doctors Without Borders. We did not send the sperm.

 :rotflmao:
"I believe you find life such a problem because you think there are good people and bad people. You're wrong, of course. There are, always and only, the bad people, but some of them are on opposite sides." Havelock Vetinari

Re: "Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption" (John Oliver) Is Shutting down
« Reply #8 on: September 15, 2015, 05:49:05 AM »
http://www.ourladyofperpetualexemption.com/#

Shame on you, you sick minded bastards  :naughty:

Somebody shout "PRAISE THE LORD".