Existential Crisis: Require assistance

[MilitantAtheist]

Hi all, I'm sorry to bother you with my crippling anxiety but I ignoring my problems only goes so far. A few weeks ago, I posted my beliefs on free will in another thread and got some positive feedback which relaxed me somewhat for a while but alas here we are. Right now I'm depressed, on OCD medication, and I've just resorted to smoking pot which, trust me, is not my thing whatsoever. I believe in free will in the sense that I'm in control of my choices and every choice I make is amidst various alternatives.

In simpler terms, I'm in control of whether or not I choose to help a stranded motorist, for example, and I should feel good about myself if I help the guy because I could've just kept on going my merry way and ignoring this person. I do honestly belief this to be true even if I can't know for sure and this thing which I've always taken as a given has now been cast into doubt.

Fact of the matter is that I can't function without the knowledge that I'm in control of what happens to me. But, in a classic case of cognitive dissonance, I can't allow myself to just live in ignorance and close my ears and eyes. Because I can't exactly approach my belief in free will from a religious supernatural standpoint. I have the basic human desire to know I'm not alone. Does anyone else think the way I do, do you believe you really have control and can justify the belief logically? Or if not, by all means, please do not pull any punches in your response to this post.

Any input is appreciated and I'm sorry if this is annoying or makes no sense etc etc. thank you for reading regardless.

[aitm]

My brother would tell me, several months before he died, that free will is indeed real, but at the same time an illusion. From the moment you wake, in some small way, you start to interfere in other peoples free-will, and they yours. Even if you remove yourself from society, people have been killed from a wayward bullet.

Free will stops when it encounters someone else's. You think that you have free will to even buy a donut, but it is hindered by the person who slows for a yellow light and you have to sit through the process to get to the store and watch a person in front of you buy the last one.

[Jack89]

Society is based of the belief that people have the ability to make choices, regardless of your view on determinism, divine providence, the weaving of the Norns, or whatever.  So to function in society, I think you have to go with the idea that you have free will, as you seem to have done.  But that doesn't mean you have complete control of what happens to you, it just means your choices can, and usually do, have a significant impact on where your life leads. 

I'm a pretty simple guy.  I try not to worry about those things I have no control over, and focus on those thing that I do.  I've also accepted that there is such a thing as objective morality, so I have a pretty solid foundation and structure to any ethical choices I have to make.  Sam Harris has some pretty interesting ideas on objective morality if you're interested in the non-religious approach.  Anyway, by recognizing that I can make choices and that there is a somewhat fuzzy, yet objective path to a fulfilling life, I've gained focus and bearing.  I'm more sure of myself and confident that I'm doing what I can to live a good life. 

[josephpalazzo]

There are certain things you are not in control - for instance, you're walking on a street, then a crazy person stabs you; or your heart go berserk, and you have a stroke. You have no control on that. But you do have control on certain things about yourself - not letting your emotions override your logic, for instance. So best to concentrate on what you can control. In the end you will have more options - for instance, someone who is an addict has fewer options as he/she has to satisfy that addiction before doing anything else.

[Mike Cl]

We have free will.  But not total.  And don't confuse free will with total control.  We don't have total control over much of anything.  Even if you were the only person in the world, you would not have total control, since you cannot control the physics of the world.  The thing you can control totally would be your choices.  No matter what the situation, you can control how you chose to relate or react to it.  Your choices or decisions shape the life you lead and it shapes how you think of that life. 

[FaithIsFilth]

I don't believe in free will even a little bit. We make zero choices in our lives, and I see where you are coming from, OP. This scares me sometimes too. Our brain is making choices for us unconsciously, and we can't be sure that our brain isn't going to decide something really fucked up out of the blue. I hope that never happens to me. It may seem to logically follow that I shouldn't feel bad about doing bad things that my brain has unconsciously decided for me, but thankfully my brain has unconsciously decided that it would not be a good idea to do bad things, because my brain has unconsciously decided that I care about the well being of others and so I see "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" as the right way to live. This has all been unconsciously decided, with no conscious choices actually being made by myself. I have made zero conscious decisions in my life. Free will is completely an illusion and you will make zero conscious decisions in your life, and you may not like that OP, but this is reality. If you can accept this reality, I think you will learn to live with it and deal with it in time. Millions of us know that free will is a complete illusion, and somehow we get along just fine.

[Mr.Obvious]

Your text kind of got me confused as to the meaning, MilitantAtheist. I'm sure that's just me though, language-barrier or something.

But regarding free will; whether or not we have it, i think, depends on how you define it.
Yes, like you, I am the one making the choices and letting other choices go by, at every moment of my conscious being. But the choices I make are 'determined' by all my previous experiences and the present situation I am in. If tomorrow I find a wallet with a thousand bucks and an adress in it, who knows what I'll choose to do with it. But when I get to that point, evne though I make the choice in the present myself, my choice would always have been the same given the exact same history.

All in all, free will, I find, is an interesting subject. But if it worries you so, I'd suggest you not look for a way to control it, but rather a way to let it go. If you can control it, fine, that's what you're doing already. If you can't control it, why bother; such is life? Philosophy can be great fun my friend, but sometimes we just got to put that lob of grey-matter on a time out and experience and feel rather than worry and think.

[Baruch]

There is under control (impulsive teenager) and over control (dictator).  Try to achieve a balance, particularly if you feel you need to control others.

On the question of free will, one person stated that they are their conscious mind, and not their unconscious mind.  To them, the unconscious mind is a stranger, who overwhelms their ability to make conscious decisions.  IMHO, the ability to make conscious decisions, in the much larger matrix of unconsciousness ... is to be learned, to be willful.  If you don't learn it, then you are under-developed, and need training.  I reject the notion that I am only my conscious mind ... I am not at all clear who I am, but I certainly consider my unconscious and subconscious to be as much a part of me as the conscious.  Thinking that consciousness is everything ... like like assuming management is everything in a corporation ... that there are no factories, no workers etc.

[Solomon Zorn]

Your post makes me think that an existential discussion may not be what you need.

Depression, and feelings of anxiety. I find we tend to associate them with thoughts, but they are not usually caused by thoughts. They come from physiological changes, of which we are only semi-conscious. You say this question of free-will is making you depressed. But the correlation between the depression and the thought may be minimal.

It's more likely your OCD medicine is fucking you up a little. Most anti-anxiety and anti-psychotic drugs aren't a 100 percent effective, and are prone to some severe side effects. If I may ask, what are you on, and how long have you been on it?

[AllPurposeAtheist]

I plan to buy the patent for free will and start selling it on ebay for $19.95*. I'll call it FREE WILL FOR ONLY $19.95 while supplies last.

*batteries not included

[MilitantAtheist]

I appreciate the responses from everyone, truly, so thank you all for taking the time to weigh in. I should have clarified that I didn't mean free will as complete and total control. Obviously that is not the case because we are heavily influence by events we don't control. I suppose I always looked at it as causality/determinism being the hand you were dealt and free will is how you choose to play it more or less.

Edit: and to answer a previous question, the medication is fluvoxamine. And I've been on it for a couple weeks. I've always dealt with a lot of anxiety and overthinking but I generally tried to internalize all of it but after I started doubting my own sense of self, it was a matter of "this is getting out of hand. I need professional help."

[Baruch]

"I suppose I always looked at it as causality/determinism being the hand you were dealt and free will is how you choose to play it more or less."

Exactly.