My main hope is that I can someday find someone and something that makes me happy enough to do art simply as a way to express predominately just positive emotions that I am not able to really say in words because my brain won't allow me.
I guess I do enjoy doing them, but the problem is the tend to come from, especially the pieces I have worked on the last couple of days, a very painful place inside me that I have to find some outlet to release... to the point I don't even necessarily enjoy doing them, they are something I have to do to try to keep my sanity. That one was done with both feelings... both love and hurt. Love in that it was a visualization of my memory of holding her hand, of the side of her body as we laid next to each other (hence why it's only the side and not her full body or face)... but hurt in that it was done on the last day I think I will ever see her. And that's why I (poorly) tried to kinda convey they are walking separate directions, but I didn't do as good of job of that as I really wanted.My main hope is that I can someday find someone and something that makes me happy enough to do art simply as a way to express predominately just positive emotions that I am not able to really say in words because my brain won't allow me. That drawing was my way of trying to say how beautiful I found lying next to her and getting to share life, if even briefly. That's what I want the majority of my art to reflect.
(Very) Rough draft of an Elephant I am going to do for a coworker who likes elephants. Trying to incorporate more Indian motifs into this one than my normal. Might also look at some Thai wats and art, see if anything useful there.(Image removed from quote.)