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The Writers Thread

Started by Jason Harvestdancer, March 11, 2013, 03:30:13 PM

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NitzWalsh

Quote from: "Jason_Harvestdancer"Add recipes for horse meat?

I've got a few recipes that I might consider adding. Or at least talk about them a bit.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
~ Arthur C. Clarke

Sal1981

Sorry for the necro-bump, didn't want to start a new thread.

I've finally started, after much deliberation, on a sort of comedy novel which I call The Amazing Adventures of God, Jesus and the Holy Spook

This is how it starts out:

QuoteGod and Jesus looked at each other.
   â€œWhat do you mean I’m you?” Jesus retorted with a raised eyebrow.
   â€œIsn’t it obvious?” God nodded.
   â€œYou’re crazy.” Jesus half-assedly asserted.
   â€œLook, how else can we fool these people and get the Hell out of here?” God became serious all of a sudden, Jesus thought God might have been serious all this time. A frightening perspective.

   God pointed at the door with his left hand while laying down in the strapped bed. and He said:
   â€œWe need the help of the Holy Ghost.” God looked to the other side, staring at the white wall and said to Jesus: “We can’t escape this place without the Holy Ghost helping us out.”
   â€œWhat in the world? That Holy Spook thing of yours? You are mad.” Jesus said, rolling his eyes.
   â€œYo, don’t diss the Holy Ghost, man.” God raised his voice a little and further pressed: “He’s everywhere, sees all, and into our hearts. Plus, he can get us the fuck out of here too.” God almost sounded mellow.
   â€œRight, right.” Jesus sighed. Jesus thought about how he got stuck here, along with this strange fellow, God, and how God claimed that He was Him and They were Eachother. Jesus was unable to wrap this thought process around Himself. Only thing He had done was claim that some pigs were infested and it got word to the wrong people who thought He might be sick or something, and of course He did resist arrest and was thrown in here with this God character.

   â€œHey.” God said. Jesus did not respond.
   â€œHey man.” God insisted.
    “What now, God?” Jesus frowned.
   â€œI’m your Dad.” God said.
   â€œWhat? How can you be my Dad, I don’t even know you, God.” Jesus had already determined that God was in the right place.
   â€œDude, just because You don’t know Me, doesn’t mean I can’t be your Dad.” God said, nodding a bit.
   â€œExcept I already know my Dad, his name’s Joseph, not God. Now stop that.” Jesus answered.
   

What do you think?

Mike Cl

Quote from: Sal1981 on June 21, 2015, 05:09:22 AM
Sorry for the necro-bump, didn't want to start a new thread.

I've finally started, after much deliberation, on a sort of comedy novel which I call The Amazing Adventures of God, Jesus and the Holy Spook

This is how it starts out:

What do you think?
Well, I'm interested enough to want to know what happens next. :)
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?<br />Then he is not omnipotent,<br />Is he able but not willing?<br />Then whence cometh evil?<br />Is he neither able or willing?<br />Then why call him god?

Sal1981

Quote from: Mike Cl on June 21, 2015, 09:39:18 AM
Well, I'm interested enough to want to know what happens next. :)
Well, I have only started recently, still figuring out more comedic situations that have *ahem* sort of biblical backing, just in modern day setting and how people would respond to them, all the while never knowing about the history of the Bible or the New Testament.

EDIT: oh, and the doc taking care of them is called Pontius Pilate.

Mike Cl

Quote from: Sal1981 on June 21, 2015, 10:48:20 AM
Well, I have only started recently, still figuring out more comedic situations that have *ahem* sort of biblical backing, just in modern day setting and how people would respond to them, all the while never knowing about the history of the Bible or the New Testament.

EDIT: oh, and the doc taking care of them is called Pontius Pilate.
If you can pull it off, it will be good stuff.
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?<br />Then he is not omnipotent,<br />Is he able but not willing?<br />Then whence cometh evil?<br />Is he neither able or willing?<br />Then why call him god?

Sal1981

It's a Google doc, so anyone can see it. IDC if someone copies it or not or publishes it without my consent; I just write for fun, not profit.

Anyways: [spoiler]https://goo.gl/dzpli0[/spoiler]

Mike Cl

Quote from: Sal1981 on June 21, 2015, 11:53:02 AM
It's a Google doc, so anyone can see it. IDC if someone copies it or not or publishes it without my consent; I just write for fun, not profit.

Anyways: [spoiler]https://goo.gl/dzpli0[/spoiler]
Why not both???
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?<br />Then he is not omnipotent,<br />Is he able but not willing?<br />Then whence cometh evil?<br />Is he neither able or willing?<br />Then why call him god?

Sal1981

Quote from: Mike Cl on June 21, 2015, 12:00:47 PM
Why not both???
Lol, like anyone would buy this besides a niche market of atheists. Nah, it's gonna be a free e-book.

Savior2006

Quote from: Sal1981 on June 21, 2015, 05:09:22 AM
Sorry for the necro-bump, didn't want to start a new thread.

I've finally started, after much deliberation, on a sort of comedy novel which I call The Amazing Adventures of God, Jesus and the Holy Spook

This is how it starts out:

What do you think?

That is kinda funny. The material really writes itself, so all you have to do is take out the posturing.
It took science to do what people imagine God can do.
--ApostateLois

"The closer you are to God the further you are from the truth."
--St Giordano

trdsf

Gah, finished two more stories.  Almost 53000 words.  Still not done yet.  But I have made progress!
"My faith in the Constitution is whole, it is complete, it is total, and I am not going to sit here and be an idle spectator to the diminution, the subversion, the destruction of the Constitution." -- Barbara Jordan