Author Topic: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.  (Read 14383 times)

So says the Talmud.
Quote
The internet’s in an uproar today over the comments of teeny-tiny sex columnist Dr. Ruth Westheimer, who said in an interview Monday that it’s “not possible” to change your mind about having sex with someone once all parties are already naked. We’ll remind you that Dr. Ruth is 87 years old.

In a interview with Diane Rehm to promote her new book The Doctor Is In, Dr. Ruth, as the Washingtonian reports, expressed some controversial views on consent:

    I am very worried about college campuses saying that a woman and a man—or two men or two women, but I talk right now about women and men—can be in bed together, Diane, and at one time, naked, and at one time he or she, most of the time they think she, can say “I changed my mind.”

    No such thing is possible. In the Talmud, in the Jewish tradition, it says when that part of the male anatomy is aroused and there’s an erection, the brain flies out of that and we have to take that very seriously, so I don’t agree with that.


As the internet started getting mad today, Dr. Ruth added this:

I am 100% against rape. I do say to women if they don't want to have sex with a man, they should not be naked in bed w/him.

That's risky behavior like crossing street against the light. If a driver hits you, he's legally in the wrong but you're in the hospital.


Once again: Dr. Ruth was born 87 years ago.

This isn’t the first time she’s expressed that sex is a “no backsies” situation; she told a Haaretz columnist in March that she planned to tell the Israeli Bar Association the same thing:

    “I do not believe that when partners are naked they can say at any time ‘I changed my mind,’” Westheimer plans to tell the lawyers at the convention. “In the Talmud they say, when that part of the male anatomy is aroused, the brain flies out of the head.” In other words, she adds: “It’s nonsense to suddenly, at the height of sexual arousal, say ‘I changed my mind.’ It will lead to many more problems. The idea of consent is nonsense. Except consent before they are naked in bed.”

Just a reminder that yes, you can change your mind at any point during sex. Dr. Ruth is not the boss of you, and right though she may be on the joys of spanking, if someone asks you to stop having sex with them, you should do so.
"In the Talmud they say, when that part of the male anatomy is aroused, the brain flies out of the head." Apparently religion has the same effect. It's disappointing to hear drivel like this from such an intelligent person.

Offline TomFoolery

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #1 on: June 10, 2015, 05:26:03 PM »
I've always held that telling women not to dress a certain way or do a certain thing because it might lead to rape really sells men short, like they're somehow incapable of raping. If dressing slutty is a surefire way to end up a victim, how in the actual hell does a day at the beach not turn into some tragic, nonconsensual orgy?

Furthermore, I would venture to say that millions of individuals probably visit gentleman's clubs every day without raping the employees there.
« Last Edit: June 10, 2015, 05:29:39 PM by TomFoolery »
How can you be sure my refusal to agree with your claim a symptom of my ignorance and not yours?

Offline AllPurposeAtheist

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #2 on: June 10, 2015, 07:06:18 PM »
Well. .the good doctor makes a point. . Don't be getting naked in bed with someone and THEN  saying no unless you're looking for an argument. .
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #3 on: June 10, 2015, 07:17:39 PM »
This reminds me of a close gay friend who has told more then one guy to leave once the guy undressed and... well let's say didn't live up to expectations. SO RUDE.

Offline aitm

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #4 on: June 10, 2015, 07:53:01 PM »
Religion aside, I would agree with her argument, once you're naked the guy is not about to go all moral at the drop of a word. Sure we can, and we have..but it is a risky proposition. I agree with her, once you're naked and rubbing bellies, something is about to happen.
A humans desire to live is exceeded only by their willingness to die for another. Even god cannot equal this magnificent sacrifice. No god has the right to judge them.-first tenant of the Panotheust

Offline Mermaid

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #5 on: June 10, 2015, 07:58:31 PM »
Religion aside, I would agree with her argument, once you're naked the guy is not about to go all moral at the drop of a word. Sure we can, and we have..but it is a risky proposition. I agree with her, once you're naked and rubbing bellies, something is about to happen.
So it's her fault if he proceeds to have sex with her against her will?

We are tied to the ocean. And when we go back to the sea, whether it is to sail or to watch - we are going back from whence we came.

John F. Kennedy

Offline aitm

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #6 on: June 10, 2015, 08:48:36 PM »
So it's her fault if he proceeds to have sex with her against her will?


she made her point quite well, men don't often think with the big head when the little one is stiff and ready. If you don't want to have sex, maybe you should not get naked and crawl in bed and start rubbing against the guy..you know?  I mean really…I can tell you I have no fucking intention of getting naked and getting into bed with a gal I don't want to have sex with…why is this so hard with women? It has been proven pretty well by now that this is not a great situation to put yourself into.
A humans desire to live is exceeded only by their willingness to die for another. Even god cannot equal this magnificent sacrifice. No god has the right to judge them.-first tenant of the Panotheust

Offline TomFoolery

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #7 on: June 10, 2015, 09:01:51 PM »
she made her point quite well, men don't often think with the big head when the little one is stiff and ready.
Don't often, or can't? I refuse to debase men by telling them they're incapable of controlling themselves when they have an erection. Again, by this logic, sexual assault rates at strip clubs should be through the roof, yet somehow, they aren't. Men are better than that. Rapists are not.

If you don't want to have sex, maybe you should not get naked and crawl in bed and start rubbing against the guy..you know?
So people are not allowed to change their minds? I'm sorry, but even if a woman is having sex with a guy and she asks him to stop mid-stroke, he needs to stop.
« Last Edit: June 10, 2015, 09:10:53 PM by TomFoolery »
How can you be sure my refusal to agree with your claim a symptom of my ignorance and not yours?

Offline aitm

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #8 on: June 10, 2015, 09:07:48 PM »
if a woman is having sex with a guy and she asks him to stop mid-stroke, he needs to stop.

I am sure you will be successful should the occasion ever arise.
A humans desire to live is exceeded only by their willingness to die for another. Even god cannot equal this magnificent sacrifice. No god has the right to judge them.-first tenant of the Panotheust

Online Shiranu

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #9 on: June 10, 2015, 09:38:57 PM »
"But officer, I was drunk... I should be excused, because I couldn't control myself!"

"But officer, I was horny... I should be excused, because I couldn't control myself!"

Not sure why the first one is universally accepted as a bad excuse, but the second one has any more merit.
"No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin or his background or his religion..." - Nelson Mandela

"Too much sanity may be madness and the maddest of all, to see life as it is and not as it should be." - Miguel de Cervantes

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #10 on: June 10, 2015, 09:58:52 PM »
How many women get a kick out of getting a guy aroused and then say no for the fun of it? We used to call them prick teasers. Why would any woman lead a man on until they are naked in bed and say no unless she is being an ass? Would a guy do that?  A woman should be able to say no, but leading men on to the point of being naked in bed is pretty damned stupid in my opinion.  Just kidding girls, because women wouldn't do that, would they? When men are aroused and can't ejaculate it hurts like hell ladies. Don't girls and woman like sex, or is it just a game for them to make men hurt? Maybe if society didn't look down on woman that like sex and call them whores, or woman that hate men, this wouldn't be a problem.
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #11 on: June 10, 2015, 10:13:39 PM »
I have to side with the females in this one.  If either partner wants to stop, even in the middle, they should be allowed to do so.  Even if they are married. 
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
Then he is not omnipotent,
Is he able but not willing?
Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able or willing?
Then why call him god?

Offline AllPurposeAtheist

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #12 on: June 10, 2015, 10:28:12 PM »
So the take away guys is if you're fucking and about 1.3 seconds from ejaculation and she or even he changes their minds you should just go,  "Well ok then..", pull out and chalk it up to. ..well,  you know. . No harm,  no foul and whatever the other person wants even 1.3 seconds before blast off..

Well I'm so glad we've cleared this whole sticky situation up before it became stickier... :eek:
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #13 on: June 10, 2015, 10:30:41 PM »
So the take away guys is if you're fucking and about 1.3 seconds from ejaculation and she or even he changes their minds you should just go,  "Well ok then..", pull out and chalk it up to. ..well,  you know. . No harm,  no foul and whatever the other person wants even 1.3 seconds before blast off..

Well I'm so glad we've cleared this whole sticky situation up before it became stickier... :eek:
At 1.3 sec., sure.  At 1.2, that I'm not sure about.
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
Then he is not omnipotent,
Is he able but not willing?
Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able or willing?
Then why call him god?

Offline AllPurposeAtheist

Re: Dr. Ruth: being naked with a man is like playing in traffic.
« Reply #14 on: June 11, 2015, 12:26:39 AM »
Toss the good doc in the list of distractions. .
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.