"I Still Believe Homosexuality is a choice..."

Started by Aletheia, December 04, 2014, 03:54:27 AM

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Aletheia

"...but I respect your opinion."

I know, I really shouldn't lower myself to youtube comment wars, but sometimes the temptation is too much, and dammit, I've had to choke on this asinine comment until I've practically wanted to vomit.

The discussion, unlike other comments, was rather peaceful, but this person was still under the impression from their own personal experience (from initially being "gay" and then falling in love and marrying a woman) that they had overcome homosexuality and therefore so too should others. They concluded that homosexuality was indeed a choice since they were able to choose to be with a woman.

I argued they were merely bisexual - not homosexual/heterosexual, and due to the fluidity of that orientation it is possible they were simply mistaken in thinking they had made any choice at all. In fact, they were still bound by their bisexuality with all the helplessness of any homosexual or heterosexual individual.

This person quoted a little scripture, went back and forth, and they finally ended with the agree to disagree bunk, in which they state their opinion is still unchanged despite evidence to the contrary and essentially calling for the "tolerate me" card. I wasn't having any of it. I've had to swallow that shit far too much and far too often.

So, with my final response, I spoke my mind. I know this individual will never change their opinions, but these things needed to be said anyway.

This is what I wrote:

Scientific evidence shows that homosexuality is not a choice, anymore than the natural color of our eyes or the color of our skin. There are those of us who feel the pressure to conform to societal standards of the "right" orientation, sometimes involving pain, suffering, and shame... and yet, our eyes see beauty in the same sex and our heart yearns for a soul mate of the same sex. Changing that by willpower alone is like spitting against the wind. People are dragged behind cars, hung until dead, stoned to death, and die gruesome deaths all around the world because they can't "change." Much like their straight counterparts, gays are at the mercy of the compulsion of love... that emotion bordering somewhere between insanity and the highest levels of self-lessness. When we fall in love, it is real, it is true, and it can be just as soul-freeing and soul-crushing as the love any straight person may ever feel. Believe contrary to the evidence around you that homosexuality is a choice, but nobody would choose to be so misunderstood, hated, and have their family turn so ruthlessly on them.

Homosexuality is merely another facet of the diversity of mankind that must be accepted as true if we are to ever to progress closer to truly being unified as a species. Mankind will never find peace in this world if he cannot accept that which he (or she) does not like or understand about his own kind.You say I am not slum, and yet you treat me as though I were a lesser person because you do not listen to the evidence that only a homosexual can disclose - the homosexual perspective. Bisexuals can fluidly move between the two main sexualities thinking they've converted over. Heterosexuals and homosexuals remain locked in the orientations chosen for them before their birth, and you have the audacity to call that a choice?
Quote from: Jakenessif you believe in the supernatural, you do not understand modern science. Period.

SGOS

OK, so this guy has an opinion.  I have an opinion.  He's an idiot.  The research on this matter has been ongoing long enough that there's a pretty good indication that sexual orientation is likely genetic.  But it's not entirely conclusive, I suppose, because they have not located a gene.  Obviously, since the answer has not been determined with the finality we would like, we have no recourse but to accept some idiot's opinion as the final word.

But beyond the fact that an opinion seems rather over-rated, why should I give a shit in the first place?  Genetic predisposition or personal life choice, I don't care who someone choses as a sexual partner, as long as it's consensual.

You know what I think is going on in that guy's mind?  By recognizing homosexuality as a genetic component of human makeup, it removes a weapon from the homophobic arsenal.  One can no longer lavish his disgust and hatred on a minority group with impunity.  It brings an asshole one step closer to the realization that he is indeed and asshole.  It takes a little wind out of the superior air.  It takes the logic out of hating and discriminating.  Pretty soon, the person will have to wake up and realize he's been being a dickhead for no really good reason.  It forces him to find some other pursuit in his life.  God forbid it might even be more productive and less harmful.


FaithIsFilth

#2
I think a bisexual can repress the gay part of themselves to the point where their gayness becomes pretty much irrelevant, sort of the same way most men (or a lot, I can't read minds) repress their attraction to young people. If it were not seen as a bad thing now, and if the law did not consider them underage, most men would have/ admit an attraction for 12/13 year old girls.

Solitary

I would like to ad that even homosexuals or lesbians can have sex with a straight person, even falling in love with the opposite sex, even though their preference is the same sex as they are. This whole idea of homosexual, bisexual, and straight is, BS from the psychological idiots that once thought homosexuality is a mental illness. We all have both traits in us, some more lopsided than others. Our hormones and circumstances decide the outcome of a relationship, or even if it happens in a sexual relationship. But societal pressures and religion make people feel guilt for having any feelings that is not according to their code of ethics. I know this because I fell in love with a lesbian, and she did with me too, even though she preferred sex with girls up to then. Having sex is a choice, but not one's feelings are not a choice anymore than what food they prefer, or what field of making a living are, that they prefer. Psychologists and psychiatrists are a product of religious nonsense and the culture they are in, like witch doctors, shamans, gurus, priests, religious authority figures, and other people that think we are spiritual beings with no brain or body, with no reliable evidence to back any of their opinions up :wall:. Solitary
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.

Jason78

Quote from: Aletheia on December 04, 2014, 03:54:27 AM
I know, I really shouldn't lower myself to youtube comment wars, but sometimes the temptation is too much, and dammit, I've had to choke on this asinine comment until I've practically wanted to vomit.

I find that taking a deep breath in, then taking a moment to accept that there are total arseholes out there, and then slowly exhaling calms me down a treat when I read things like that.

Edit: referring of course to the comment that you read, not what you just wrote.
Winner of WitchSabrinas Best Advice Award 2012


We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real
tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. -Plato

Aletheia

Quote from: Jason78 on December 04, 2014, 01:30:09 PM
I find that taking a deep breath in, then taking a moment to accept that there are total arseholes out there, and then slowly exhaling calms me down a treat when I read things like that.

Edit: referring of course to the comment that you read, not what you just wrote.

This helped to restore my faith in humanity:



Quote from: Jakenessif you believe in the supernatural, you do not understand modern science. Period.

stromboli

You have to understand. I grew up with these types of narrow minded people. And really.... oh wait, no; they are just stupid.

aitm

Most straight people are simply ignorant, and as there are more of them the ignorance sometimes seems overwhelming, of course that is because it is. Straight people think its either "black or white". Most straights, being ignorant, are also unaware that anywhere from 1.5 to 2% of humanity is born androgynous, with both sex organs. Now to a reasonable person, this should suggest that as physical androgyny is very real, psychological androgyny should be equally possible. So that there should be a multitude of degrees to which any individual can find themselves attracted to either or both sexes. I have never been able to grasp what's hard about this to understand.
A humans desire to live is exceeded only by their willingness to die for another. Even god cannot equal this magnificent sacrifice. No god has the right to judge them.-first tenant of the Panotheust

Gawdzilla Sama

It's not a choice for me. When I lived on Miami Beach I was declared the straightest man on Earth. Sorry, guys.
We 'new atheists' have a reputation for being militant, but make no mistake  we didn't start this war. If you want to place blame put it on the the religious zealots who have been poisoning the minds of the  young for a long long time."
PZ Myers

Aletheia

Quote from: Gawdzilla Sama on December 04, 2014, 02:05:44 PM
It's not a choice for me. When I lived on Miami Beach I was declared the straightest man on Earth. Sorry, guys.

It's ok, the gay community will manage without your undeniable beauty in the ranks. It won't be easy, but they'll survive.
Quote from: Jakenessif you believe in the supernatural, you do not understand modern science. Period.

Aletheia

Understood Aitm. The forum I've been cheating on AF with has a lot of people of different sexualities, some of whom are androgynous, asexual, demi-sexual... etc. It's been rather interesting meeting such people, even if only through the internet.
Quote from: Jakenessif you believe in the supernatural, you do not understand modern science. Period.

aitm

A humans desire to live is exceeded only by their willingness to die for another. Even god cannot equal this magnificent sacrifice. No god has the right to judge them.-first tenant of the Panotheust

TrueStory

Being a choice is irrelevant.  It's just another word game that bible thumpers play to create an issue out of a non issue.  We should be able to have sex with any consensual partner we want to, no point discussing it further with someone who believes in magic.
Please don't take anything I say seriously.

Solitary

Quote from: Aletheia on December 04, 2014, 01:43:11 PM
This helped to restore my faith in humanity:




I've seen this before, but it is a great video!
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.

Solitary

Quote from: TrueStory on December 04, 2014, 03:27:42 PM
Being a choice is irrelevant.  It's just another word game that bible thumpers play to create an issue out of a non issue.  We should be able to have sex with any consensual partner we want to, no point discussing it further with someone who believes in magic.
That is a great response! 
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action.