Hey there ! I'm new here.

[SGOS]

Sorry about that, to further elaborate I will tell you about myself so you guys can further understand. I think I have been questioning my own faith for the past month now.  This may be a little long.

I questioned my faith for years and years, so I don't think it's "a little  long."  I never felt like there was a rush.  I just kept the door to religion open. If it had been a forced decision to either believe or not believe, I think I would have said I didn't believe, but that's not how belief worked for me.  Then one day after many years, it dawned on me that I didn't believe, probably never really did after I was 5 years old.  I never suffered from depression or anxiety because of my long search.  I didn't feel pressured.  I was just waiting for something to happen, but nothing did.

[LazyLotusEater (OP)]

I questioned my faith for years and years, so I don't think it's "a little  long."  I never felt like there was a rush.  I just kept the door to religion open. If it had been a forced decision to either believe or not believe, I think I would have said I didn't believe, but that's not how belief worked for me.  Then one day after many years, it dawned on me that I didn't believe, probably never really did after I was 5 years old.  I never suffered from depression or anxiety because of my long search.  I did feel pressured.  I was just waiting for something to happen, but nothing did.

Sorry , the way I typed could have been misinterpreted, I meant my story was sort of long. Anyway, I appreciate you sharing that anyway because I think it's interesting . I myself was always pressured to go to church and read the bible etc., my friend for example was pressuring me to come get "saved" and was telling me that I'll never know my last breath.

[Desdinova]

Sorry , the way I typed could have been misinterpreted, I meant my story was sort of long. Anyway, I appreciate you sharing that anyway because I think it's interesting . I myself was always pressured to go to church and read the bible etc., my friend for example was pressuring me to come get "saved" and was telling me that I'll never know my last breath.

It's religious peer pressure.  I always felt funny and uncomfortable about religion.  Like something wasn't right.  I could never put my finger on it.  Until one day it just happened.  There wasn't any watershed moment, no blinding epiphany.  I just realized it.  And then I knew what that funny feeling was.  There is no God.

[Hijiri Byakuren]

Yes, her argument was that she was allowed to hate and judge people because God does too.  I tried to paraphrase as much as I could but, at the time I said I believe that God loves everyone and she said I was wrong because God hated Esau. Then she says that it's okay to judge as long as you didn't commit that sin yourself.

I've always found this attitude interesting, particularly from followers of a scripture containing the line, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."

Anyway, I feel like I have been going through depression. I had been reading parts the bible more and comparing it to other stories written before it and the similarities. I've been reading scientific and historical findings and comparing them. At 20 years old I am seeking what the truth is and what makes more sense. I hope it all made sense to everyone lol.

You might like Richard Dawkins' "The God Delusion." I've read it myself, although I was a bit bored by it because I'm not really the target audience, but I think it might be up your alley. It does a good job of compiling all the relevant arguments in one place, and then addressing them from the perspective of an evolutionary biologist. I can also highly recommend all of Dawkins' "pure science" works.

The late Christopher Hitchens is good if you're just looking for the arguments against the Bible or the existence of God. Even if you're not convinced, it would still be good for you to know what the objections are. Here's a little sample of what you'd be getting from him:

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Of course there's Neil DeGrasse Tyson, Bill Nye (the Science Guy), and tons of other folks who are worth listening to on subjects where science intersects religious doctrine.

And finally, over the course of a year I've been compiling a "Videos Theists should Watch" playlist. Not all of these videos directly address religion, but I think make good food for thought when it comes to equipping oneself to critically analyze religious thought. There are currently 23 videos of varying length, including the Hitchens video I linked above:

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFOpXFlYHQTlXlfVHTCbuxGBXVZbafkZ4

[LazyLotusEater (OP)]

I've always found this attitude interesting, particularly from followers of a scripture containing the line, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."
You might like Richard Dawkins' "The God Delusion." I've read it myself, although I was a bit bored by it because I'm not really the target audience, but I think it might be up your alley. It does a good job of compiling all the relevant arguments in one place, and then addressing them from the perspective of an evolutionary biologist. I can also highly recommend all of Dawkins' "pure science" works.

The late Christopher Hitchens is good if you're just looking for the arguments against the Bible or the existence of God. Even if you're not convinced, it would still be good for you to know what the objections are. Here's a little sample of what you'd be getting from him:

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Thanks, I appreciate it!

Of course there's Neil DeGrasse Tyson, Bill Nye (the Science Guy), and tons of other folks who are worth listening to on subjects where science intersects religious doctrine.

And finally, over the course of a year I've been compiling a "Videos Theists should Watch" playlist. Not all of these videos directly address religion, but I think make good food for thought when it comes to equipping oneself to critically analyze religious thought. There are currently 23 videos of varying length, including the Hitchens video I linked above:

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFOpXFlYHQTlXlfVHTCbuxGBXVZbafkZ4

[Mr.Obvious]

Not saying you have to add this one:

But if you haven't watched it; it's worth it. Hitchens is amazing, but Fry's monologue takes the cake in my opinion. I was already an atheist when I first watched this clip, but felt like I had to respect the Roman Catholic Church and religion itself automatically and on no real basis. This clip helped me personally to move past that.

source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5OMNPmoVAw

[JohnD]

Welcome to our reality. You have taken the most important step by questioning the dogma  that you have been subjected to. Everyone here has their own story. Mine was an easy one, i grew up in London, raised a Catholic and stop believing around the same time i stopped believing in Santa Claus. Luckily enough religion wasn't a big deal in our community. It was seen as something personal, if you wanted to practice then fair enough but don't force it down the throats of others.