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Hello from Utah

Started by anatheiststhoughts, March 18, 2014, 02:09:16 AM

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anatheiststhoughts

I was born and raised in Utah. I always kept an open mind and now that open mind has led me to be an atheist. I have been an atheist for over 10 years now and yet only my close friends and my direct family knows this. I have wanted to be open with my extended family about me being an atheist, but every time I wanted to do so I would stop myself. I never see a winning situation for me. every situation i see is that my extended family would see me as an entirely different person like someone who would be a bad influence to their kids. 'I'm scared that it will only make matters worse and yet it is eating me up inside knowing that i can't tell people who i really am (I've actually had a fight break out because someone suspected me being an atheist). So i guess the question i have is. . . if anyone has had this sort of fear of rejection what finally gave you the courage to face that fear?

Plu

Welcome to the forums. Unfortunately I can't really help you with your question, but I hope you'll enjoy this place regardless. There's probably others who will have a more useful response :)

stromboli

#2
Welcome. You didn't stipulate but I'm guessing you are Mormon. I am an ex-Mormon. If you are, there are some websites dedicated specifically to help youhttp://mormoncurtain.com/

http://www.exmormonforums.com/

http://www.postmormon.org/exp_e/

These sites all center in Utah. Even if you are not a Mormon, there are a number of people on these forums that are atheists. They also have meetings and points of contact to give you people to advise and help. Believe me, I know what you are going through. You feel isolated because every one around you seems hostile. The good news is that the reality is better than the church lets on- people are leaving about as fast as they join. You'll discover the church is one big lie from start to finish. The truth can be a real eye opener.


AllPurposeAtheist

I once got drunk in a park with winos in SLC and woke up on a median strip on a busy highway..  Try that first. LOL
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.

SGOS

Quote from: AllPurposeAtheist on March 18, 2014, 12:16:39 PM
I once got drunk in a park with winos in SLC and woke up on a median strip on a busy highway..  Try that first. LOL
KSLC is a major and necessary hub for air traffic, but every time I land there on my way to someplace I want to go, I'm aware that I'm in the middle of a fantasy land.  It always seems odd.

Moralnihilist

For me, it was simply a matter of enough being enough. It may suck for a bit for you once you make it known that you no longer believe in the great eyeball in the sky, but eventually people will either see and accept you for what you are or they will no longer be in your life. Religion is all about control. Without that controlling force in your life, you may find that some "friends" and even some family want nothing to do with you. And thats OK, its called moving on. Some people may get agro about it, those are generally lost causes. But it sounds as if you have several close family and friends that don't care either way, and to be honest thats all one needs in life.
Science doesn't give a damn about religions, because "damns" are not measurable units and therefore have no place in research. As soon as it's possible to detect damns, we'll quantize perdition and number all the levels of hell. Until then, science doesn't care.

AllPurposeAtheist

Quote from: SGOS on March 18, 2014, 12:21:53 PM
KSLC is a major and necessary hub for air traffic, but every time I land there on my way to someplace I want to go, I'm aware that I'm in the middle of a fantasy land.  It always seems odd.
Nothing wrong with getting drunk with the winos in the park. Some of my best friends are winos in the park.
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.

SGOS

Quote from: AllPurposeAtheist on March 18, 2014, 12:32:16 PM
Nothing wrong with getting drunk with the winos in the park. Some of my best friends are winos in the park.
Hey, don't get on MY case.  I never said there was anything wrong with that. :biggrin:

AllPurposeAtheist

We'll visit you in the drunk tank, bring you cigarettes, bribe guards and tell the other inmates you're to soft and delicate so please don't mess with you.
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.

brandon

I had that fear of rejection until I stopped caring. My mother-in-law thought I was christian until right before I married my wife. I actually used to go to church with my wife before we were married, even though I was an atheist. She knew it but no one else did. The preacher then started talking to me and we became acquainted. Somehow or another, the preacher asked me a question that assumed I believed in God and I told him that I didn't really believe, trying to be respectful as possible. He still respected me, and treated me as a human, and I think he liked the conversations that he could have with an atheist. He is actually the same preacher who did our wedding. The mother-in-law scoffs at the fact that I don't believe in god, but anytime she throws something about god into a conversation, I just smile like you would smile at a child who thinks the moon is made of cheese, and continue the conversation. She now, rarely, ever, brings up religion.

My point is, it can be scary to come out, until you realize you are an adult who can defend your thoughts, probably 10x better than any christian, and that if you portray confidence in yourself, people are less likely to challenge you. Be confident. Be yourself. Good luck to you!

wolf39us


AllPurposeAtheist

Living in shelters a year with fundies everywhere was a trip, but once they realized I wasn't biting for the bullshit and wasn't worshipping the "devil" they pretty much backed off and realized I'm really no different than they are except that I know my problems are real and not imaginary boogiemen out of the sky. I found there are a lot of people who claim the xtian mantra, but aren't very far from being atheists themselves. The only thing holding most back is fear of what others might think of them or fear they might miss out on a cut of the loot churches bring in daily. They are unaware that the church is almost never cutting anyone in on the take.
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.