Author Topic: Reading the Bible literally or literately  (Read 979 times)

Re: Reading the Bible literally or literately
« Reply #30 on: May 19, 2018, 02:03:47 PM »
Oh, good - everyone knows God loves the smell of cooking meat.
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"No matter how cynical you become, it's never enough to keep up."
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Online Cavebear

Re: Reading the Bible literally or literately
« Reply #31 on: May 19, 2018, 05:25:10 PM »
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Oh, good - everyone knows God loves the smell of cooking meat.

Well, if its bacon...
Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Re: Reading the Bible literally or literately
« Reply #32 on: May 19, 2018, 05:52:15 PM »
He also likes the smell burning of long pig, that's why there were so many autos-da-fe back in the day.
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"No matter how cynical you become, it's never enough to keep up."
Lily Tomlin

Online Cavebear

Re: Reading the Bible literally or literately
« Reply #33 on: May 19, 2018, 05:58:35 PM »
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He also likes the smell burning of long pig, that's why there were so many autos-da-fe back in the day.

Auto-de-whew?.  That's like long pig stew, right?  A little garlic, a stone, a carrot...  pretty soon you have a good soup for granny.  Wait, where's Granny?

Granny  "I'm not dead yet"...

THUMP!
Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Re: Reading the Bible literally or literately
« Reply #34 on: May 28, 2018, 03:25:13 PM »
well when you put it that way, I guess those Levi priests werent all that dumb... bbq meat everyday
not expecting god to show up, but if he does we’re going to have to beat the prick up.

Offline Baruch

Re: Reading the Bible literally or literately
« Reply #35 on: May 28, 2018, 05:15:18 PM »
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well when you put it that way, I guess those Levi priests werent all that dumb... bbq meat everyday

And that is the corruption, of the son's of Levi, that brought down the curse of Adonai ... paleo-diet ;-)  But at least the meat was kosher.  Boiled and salted meat mostly (not BBQ) with the blood drained first.  The stuff on the fire was for Adonai.  Pagan priests may have roasted their meat, when they weren't eating it "tartar".  So BBQ is actually blasphemy in Judaism ;-)

Here is an ancient Greek joke ... in mythology, when animal sacrifice was invented, Prometheus (the Titan) that created mankind and provide them with fire, instructed them on the smart way to feed the gods.  So basically Prometheus (foresight) arranged a trick.  Two piles of animal sacrifice were provided for Zeus to choose from.  He had the human cover good meat with skins, and cover bones with the animal fat.  Zeus wanted high calories ... so he chose the appetizing looking pile (who wants to eat cracklins (fried pork skin) unless you are Texan, right?).  So turned out, the priests (and the contributors of the sacrificial animal) got the better deal, and Zeus had one more reason to eternally persecute Prometheus.

Zeus (aka Dios in PIE) doesn't like foresight, he likes hindsight (Epimetheus, the brother of Prometheus).  Zeus invented woman, gave her to Epimetheus, along with the Pandora's box of wedding gifts.  Zeus warned Epimetheus about having Pandora not open the box, but he knew that Epimetheus would forget, and Pandora's curiosity would get the better of her.
« Last Edit: May 28, 2018, 05:17:09 PM by Baruch »
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Online Cavebear

Re: Reading the Bible literally or literately
« Reply #36 on: May 29, 2018, 06:17:37 AM »
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And that is the corruption, of the son's of Levi, that brought down the curse of Adonai ... paleo-diet ;-)  But at least the meat was kosher.  Boiled and salted meat mostly (not BBQ) with the blood drained first.  The stuff on the fire was for Adonai.  Pagan priests may have roasted their meat, when they weren't eating it "tartar".  So BBQ is actually blasphemy in Judaism ;-)

Here is an ancient Greek joke ... in mythology, when animal sacrifice was invented, Prometheus (the Titan) that created mankind and provide them with fire, instructed them on the smart way to feed the gods.  So basically Prometheus (foresight) arranged a trick.  Two piles of animal sacrifice were provided for Zeus to choose from.  He had the human cover good meat with skins, and cover bones with the animal fat.  Zeus wanted high calories ... so he chose the appetizing looking pile (who wants to eat cracklins (fried pork skin) unless you are Texan, right?).  So turned out, the priests (and the contributors of the sacrificial animal) got the better deal, and Zeus had one more reason to eternally persecute Prometheus.

Zeus (aka Dios in PIE) doesn't like foresight, he likes hindsight (Epimetheus, the brother of Prometheus).  Zeus invented woman, gave her to Epimetheus, along with the Pandora's box of wedding gifts.  Zeus warned Epimetheus about having Pandora not open the box, but he knew that Epimetheus would forget, and Pandora's curiosity would get the better of her.

That is one of the most informed, yet least applicable argruments I have ever seen.  Congratulations...

You never cease to amaze me with both information AND lack of applicabilty at the same time! 

Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Offline Baruch

Re: Reading the Bible literally or literately
« Reply #37 on: May 29, 2018, 07:06:51 PM »
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That is one of the most informed, yet least applicable argruments I have ever seen.  Congratulations...

You never cease to amaze me with both information AND lack of applicabilty at the same time!

My connections to circumstances are tenuous but profound.  Poetic license.  If I were to rebut everything in a literal manner, word by word, with full footnotes, I would be like Young Frankenstein, one our other posters, dealing with Xero's latest screed.
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