Author Topic: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay  (Read 1327 times)

Online Hydra009

Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« on: April 05, 2018, 12:11:57 AM »
And if that's true, then I'm the gayest, flamingest, prettiest princess who ever lived!

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Also, it's strange that he's eager to talk about sex (with particular interest in homosexuality) but can't quite bring himself to tackle the dreaded o-word.  Edging?  We've all been there.  But sometimes you just have to give in, open your mouth, and just go for it without stopping till you're done.
« Last Edit: April 05, 2018, 12:13:58 AM by Hydra009 »

Offline Cavebear

Re: Pastor: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2018, 12:15:25 AM »
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And if that's true, then I'm the gayest, flamingest, prettiest princess who ever lived!

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Also, it's strange that he's eager to talk about sex (with particular interest in homosexuality) but can't quite bring himself to tackle the dreaded o-word.  Edging?  We've all been there.  But sometimes you just have to give in, open your mouth, and just go for it without stopping till you're done.

Well it is sort of one-sided...  LOL!
Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Offline Baruch

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #2 on: April 05, 2018, 12:24:42 AM »
If masturbation makes you blind, then I bet this guy can't see his own video ;-)
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Offline GSOgymrat

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #3 on: April 05, 2018, 12:54:55 AM »
I suspect Coach Dave is trying to associate masturbation with homosexuality to deter young men from a practice he considers against Christian values. I also suspect he knows this interpretation is a stretch but if it keeps one person from masturbating he probably thinks it is justified. Fundamentalists frequently make these kinds of false associations, e.g. sinful behavior results in natural disasters. His association of orgasms with bowel movements makes sense because both are considered by fundamentalists unclean and degrading, as opposed to the spiritual and beyond the body. People like Coach Dave and I have completely different value systems and the chances we could anything better than tolerate one another is unlikely.
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Offline Cavebear

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #4 on: April 05, 2018, 01:17:19 AM »
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I suspect Coach Dave is trying to associate masturbation with homosexuality to deter young men from a practice he considers against Christian values. I also suspect he knows this interpretation is a stretch but if it keeps one person from masturbating he probably thinks it is justified. Fundamentalists frequently make these kinds of false associations, e.g. sinful behavior results in natural disasters. His association of orgasms with bowel movements makes sense because both are considered by fundamentalists unclean and degrading, as opposed to the spiritual and beyond the body. People like Coach Dave and I have completely different value systems and the chances we could anything better than tolerate one another is unlikely.

On the other hand, he might just simply be insane as as many theists are.
Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Online PickelledEggs

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #5 on: April 05, 2018, 01:29:08 AM »
I must be really gay, then
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"I have an open mind, but not so open that my brains will fall out" -James Randi
"One who truly hates himself cannot love, he cannot place his trust in another." - NGE

Offline Cavebear

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #6 on: April 05, 2018, 01:36:18 AM »
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I must be really gay, then

I don't see how getting physical pleasure/release ion your own is wrong.  It seems pretty harmless and natural.
Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Online PickelledEggs

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #7 on: April 05, 2018, 01:41:17 AM »
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I don't see how getting physical pleasure/release ion your own is wrong.  It seems pretty harmless and natural.
Yeah, me neither... But I guess that is where the saying "this is so good it's a sin" comes from

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"Tell Pilate to release the files!!!" - Bill Hicks
"I have an open mind, but not so open that my brains will fall out" -James Randi
"One who truly hates himself cannot love, he cannot place his trust in another." - NGE

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #8 on: April 05, 2018, 02:54:37 PM »
The guy's just trying to save money for people in the afterlife, since, according to Father Guido Sarducci, masterbation in this life costs you money in the afterlife (as do other sins, but masturbation really adds up!)


Quote from: Father Guido Sarducci (Don Novello)
Life is a job. You get $14.50 a day, but after you die, you have to pay for your sins. Stealing a hub cap is around $100. Masturbation is 35 cents (it doesn't seem like much, but it adds up). If there's money left when you subtract what you owe from what you've earned, you can go to heaven. If not, you have to go back to work. (Sort of like reincarnation -- many nuns are Mafia guys working it off.)
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Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #9 on: April 05, 2018, 03:02:46 PM »
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I don't see how getting physical pleasure/release ion your own is wrong.  It seems pretty harmless and natural.
Hell, some religious folks think that any kind of pleasure at all is horribly sinful - dancing, music, food. As a Southern Baptist I was forbidden from dancing when I was a kid. Still don't know how, when I dance I look like Gomez Addams trying to dance.

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Online Shiranu

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #10 on: April 05, 2018, 03:12:14 PM »
I mean, you do have a dude's dick in your hand and are normally quite enthusiastic about jerking it... that is a little gay, if you don't actually think about it.
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Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #11 on: April 05, 2018, 03:13:56 PM »



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"The Republicans went from Abraham Lincoln to Sarah Palin to Donald Trump. No wonder they don't believe in evolution."
Any Borowitz

Offline Munch

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #12 on: April 05, 2018, 08:03:08 PM »
does it count a double gay if you jerk off your boyfriend?

Does it count as quad points if you do so with two boyfriends same time?

I'd like to know his scoring system.

Offline Baruch

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #13 on: April 05, 2018, 08:51:31 PM »
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does it count a double gay if you jerk off your boyfriend?

Does it count as quad points if you do so with two boyfriends same time?

I'd like to know his scoring system.

TMI or TMP?
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Online Hydra009

Re: Christian talk show host: Masturbation is gay
« Reply #14 on: April 06, 2018, 02:18:42 AM »
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I mean, you do have a dude's dick in your hand and are normally quite enthusiastic about jerking it... that is a little gay, if you don't actually think about it.
Yeah, but it's your dick.  If it was some other guy's dick, then yeah, that's pretty gay.  Unless you're practicing for straight sex.  That doesn't count, right guys?  Asking for a friend...

 

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