Masturbation Linked to Sexual Orientation

Started by SGOS, December 15, 2017, 04:11:06 PM

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SGOS

What better source could there be for this information than the Mormon Church?  The leaked Handbook for Church Leaders, explains logically how masturbation and sexual orientation are linked.  I thought the most helpful explanation was,  'Self-masturbation is almost universal among those who engage in homosexual behavior.' 

Another helpful insight points out that homosexuality is a learned behavior in dysfunctional families.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5183605/Mormon-guidebook-claims-masturbation-turns-gay.html#ixzz51MkFeBHX


Baruch

Sorry, I almost thought you were serious at first ;-))

While the Bible is bad enough on its own, Church doctrine pulled out of a hat ... is even worse.

The whole point of it was ... that Onan didn't want to do his marital duty vs-a-vis Tamar.  It has nothing to do with sexual orientation.  So it depends on why you are masturbating.  Same as any other activity.  And the notion, in today's world, that I must produce the maximum number of sons, for the army, is equally stupid.
Ha’át’íísh baa naniná?
Azee’ Å,a’ish nanídį́į́h?
Táadoo ánít’iní.
What are you doing?
Are you taking any medications?
Don't do that.

SGOS


Hakurei Reimu

Quote from: SGOS on December 15, 2017, 04:11:06 PM
'Self-masturbation is almost universal among those who engage in homosexual behavior.' 
Anyone with a healthy sexual development would laugh, pointing out that masturbation is almost universal among those who engage in heterosexual behavior, as well.
Warning: Don't Tease The Miko!
(she bites!)
Spinny Miko Avatar shamelessly ripped off from Iosys' Neko Miko Reimu

SGOS

Quote from: Hakurei Reimu on December 15, 2017, 06:25:20 PM
Anyone with a healthy sexual development would laugh, pointing out that masturbation is almost universal among those who engage in heterosexual behavior, as well.
Actually, it's universal among people that breath.

Munch

Quote from: SGOS on December 15, 2017, 06:41:14 PM
Actually, it's universal among people that breath.

its universal among most mammals too. plus its healthier, stress relieving, and doesn't lead to accidents, like the 13th mormon baby popping out.
'Political correctness is fascism pretending to be manners' - George Carlin

Mike Cl

Quote from: Hakurei Reimu on December 15, 2017, 06:25:20 PM
Anyone with a healthy sexual development would laugh, pointing out that masturbation is almost universal among those who engage in heterosexual behavior, as well.
I think it has been proven scientifically that 99% of all people masturbate and the other 1% lies about it.  :smiley:
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?<br />Then he is not omnipotent,<br />Is he able but not willing?<br />Then whence cometh evil?<br />Is he neither able or willing?<br />Then why call him god?

Blackleaf

Quote from: Munch on December 15, 2017, 07:45:02 PM
its universal among most mammals too. plus its healthier, stress relieving, and doesn't lead to accidents, like the 13th mormon baby popping out.

And homosexuality has been observed in non-human animals as well. Coincidence?! I think not!
"Oh, wearisome condition of humanity,
Born under one law, to another bound;
Vainly begot, and yet forbidden vanity,
Created sick, commanded to be sound."
--Fulke Greville--

Gawdzilla Sama

Quote from: Mike Cl on December 15, 2017, 08:39:33 PM
I think it has been proven scientifically that 99% of all people masturbate and the other 1% lies about it.  :smiley:
There are only two kinds of people who don't masturbate, saints and liars.
We 'new atheists' have a reputation for being militant, but make no mistake  we didn't start this war. If you want to place blame put it on the the religious zealots who have been poisoning the minds of the  young for a long long time."
PZ Myers

GSOgymrat

Everyone masturbates but gay men treat it like an Olympic event.

Luther Martini

Masturbating makes one gay?  Good grief is that in addition to causing reduced visual acuity and growing hair on the palms?  :surprise:

Mike Cl

Quote from: Luther Martini on December 16, 2017, 04:41:49 PM
Masturbating makes one gay?  Good grief is that in addition to causing reduced visual acuity and growing hair on the palms?  :surprise:
Well, yeah.  At least I always feel happier when I've finished.  And the hair on my palms simply makes the process better.
Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?<br />Then he is not omnipotent,<br />Is he able but not willing?<br />Then whence cometh evil?<br />Is he neither able or willing?<br />Then why call him god?

SGOS

Mother says to her son:  If you masturbate too much you will go blind.

Son replies:  Then I'll only do it until I have to wear glasses.

Hydra009

Quote from: GSOgymrat on December 16, 2017, 04:23:10 PMEveryone masturbates but gay men treat it like an Olympic event.
Is it really true that gay men masturbate more than straight men?  We need to verify this empirically, for science!  Perhaps we should make it an actual Olympic event.  :P

SGOS

#14
Why not an Olympic event?  Since I started watching the Olympics, they have expanded the menu of events exponentially.  If someone gets an idea for a crazy stunt, they make an event out of it.  Something stands a better chance of becoming an actual event if it involves spending an inordinate amount of time upside down.  Some of the events can't even be empirically scored.  They have to have judges subjectively rate the performances, where the Russian judge gives the Russian a 10, and all the others give him a 4.5.  It shouldn't even be called competition.  They could make a Jack Ass Movie out of some of the events, and just pay people do anything they can think of providing it might be dangerous enough to potentially break their necks.

Masturbation would make an actual competitive event like competition used to be, because it could be empirically measured, rather than depend on biased judges.  They could have competitive sub divisions like the Clean and Jerk based on speed, or competition based on distance like the Shot Put, or competition based on height like the Pole Vault.