I am Allah. Ask me everything you want to know about Islam

[St Truth (OP)]

Hi,

My name is Allah. It's written like this in Arabic:

الله خنزير

My lowly filthy assistant, Muhammad, is the guy who wears a turban stuffed with dynamites. You've seen the cartoons?

But don't listen to him, that violent power-hungry sadistic sod. Come directly to me if you need to know about my religion Islam. I'll teach you how to be a good Muslim. If you're an atheist, please forsake your godless way and follow me, the true path of Islam.

الله خنزير  الله خنزير  الله خنزير  الله خنزير  الله خنزير

[Baruch]

Hi,

My name is Allah. It's written like this in Arabic:

الله خنزير

My lowly filthy assistant, Muhammad, is the guy who wears a turban stuffed with dynamites. You've seen the cartoons?

But don't listen to him, that violent power-hungry sadistic sod. Come directly to me if you need to know about my religion Islam. I'll teach you how to be a good Muslim. If you're an atheist, please forsake your godless way and follow me, the true path of Islam.

الله خنزير  الله خنزير  الله خنزير  الله خنزير  الله خنزير

You should consider having your doctor reexamine your ADHD medication dosage.

[pr126]

Allah is Muhammad’s sock puppet.

[Munch]

Hey Allah. I will convey this question in your language.

كيف كبيرة القضيب الخاص بك؟

or for english dialect.

kayf kabirat alqadib alkhasu bk?

[Baruch]

Hey Allah. I will convey this question in your language.

كيف كبيرة القضيب الخاص بك؟

or for english dialect.

kayf kabirat alqadib alkhasu bk?

Bigger isn't better.

[St Truth (OP)]

Bigger isn't better.

I knew you were a fagGod.

[Baruch]

I knew you were a fagGod.

You know that isn't an insult among the posters here?  Theist is the insult ;-)

[St Truth (OP)]

You know that isn't an insult among the posters here?  Theist is the insult ;-)

Faggot isn't insulting. FagGod is. As you are well aware, G-d is a dirty word. Just like YHWH. Ssme thing with Pig or P-g.

[aitm]

Truth, tone down the personal insults please.

[St Truth (OP)]

Truth, tone down the personal insults please.

Yes, I was mistaken. It was Munch who asked me how big my penis was, not Baruch. My mistake. Sorry. That's the problem with typing on my phone. I copied the bit did a google translate and I thought, hey, this must be Baruch when it was Munch.

I don't want to conceal anything. Let's just say that I am larger than most people here. I would readily post a pic but I'm not sure about the legality of such a post, seeing that in most countries, you must be 18 to post your own nude pic.

[Munch]

Yes, I was mistaken. It was Munch who asked me how big my penis was, not Baruch. My mistake. Sorry. That's the problem with typing on my phone. I copied the bit did a google translate and I thought, hey, this must be Baruch when it was Munch.

No I didn't, I asked how big Allah's was..unless you are Allah?

[Hijiri Byakuren]

Damn it, now I kinda wish @PickelledEggs hadn't banned my God account. XD

[St Truth (OP)]

No I didn't, I asked how big Allah's was..unless you are Allah?

Of course I am Allah. Read the heading of this thread.

[pr126]

Dear Allah, where does the dark go when you turn the lights on?

[Baruch]

Dear Allah, where does the dark go when you turn the lights on?

Actually addressed by Medieval theologians (who didn't know about the Earth in modern terms).