Clark Kent's Glasses Really Do Mask His Identity... Kinda

Started by SGOS, September 02, 2016, 12:04:11 PM

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AllPurposeAtheist

Lois Lane was forever the jilted woman because unknown to the public Superman had no use for a penis, in essence he was Superken. So the public, forever fixated on sex overlooked the fact that his glasses hid nothing..
That's my theory and I'm sticking to it.
All hail my new signature!

Admit it. You're secretly green with envy.

Cavebear

Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Unbeliever

God Not Found
"There is a sucker born-again every minute." - C. Spellman

Baruch

But I thought that Jimmy Olson was to Superman what Robin was to Batman ;-)
Ha’át’íísh baa naniná?
Azee’ Å,a’ish nanídį́į́h?
Táadoo ánít’iní.
What are you doing?
Are you taking any medications?
Don't do that.

Unbeliever

Yeah, Jimmy couldn't rely on his whistling ability, so SM made him a special watch.
God Not Found
"There is a sucker born-again every minute." - C. Spellman

Baruch

Quote from: Unbeliever on November 04, 2016, 08:31:05 PM
Yeah, Jimmy couldn't rely on his whistling ability, so SM made him a special watch.

Jimmy also sometimes dressed in drag, to get a scoop ;-))

https://envisioningtheamericandream.com/2014/10/16/miss-jimmy-olsen-comic-cross-dresser/

Clark Kent's glasses might not mask his identity, but the feminine side of Jimmy Olson gets dates.
Ha’át’íísh baa naniná?
Azee’ Å,a’ish nanídį́į́h?
Táadoo ánít’iní.
What are you doing?
Are you taking any medications?
Don't do that.

Munch

'Political correctness is fascism pretending to be manners' - George Carlin

Cavebear

Quote from: Munch on November 14, 2016, 06:06:18 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HzqtfpQT37w

The essential problem DC had with Superman was that Superman was really bulked and Clark Kent wasn't...  Other characters were the same in reality and alter Egos, or changed with some SHAZAM phrase.  Or unexplained like the Hulk/Banner.
Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Ro3bert

Quote from: AllPurposeAtheist on October 29, 2016, 12:48:20 PM
Lois Lane was forever the jilted woman because unknown to the public Superman had no use for a penis, in essence he was Superken. So the public, forever fixated on sex overlooked the fact that his glasses hid nothing..
That's my theory and I'm sticking to it.

From what I read/saw Superman's ejaculate would go right through some poor earth female like she was impaled. Not too sure that would be a pleasant way to die.

Hydra009

Quote from: Cavebear on November 17, 2016, 05:11:20 AMThe essential problem DC had with Superman was that Superman was really bulked and Clark Kent wasn't
Spider-man/Peter Parker has the same problem.





He must do an amazing job at covering up those rippling muscles.

SGOS

Unrelated but..., Child star Tobey Mcguire just fell off the map, while his annoying loser nemesis costar, James Franko, is now making all the movies.  Several years ago, I was cruising the net when I was lured by one of those "Ten most and least personable stars in Hollywood" click bait advertising gimmicks.  I used to fall for that shit all the time, and still do once in a while.

Tobey was at the bottom of the list, rude, arrogant, and downright unlikeable in real life.  For what it's worth, Johnny Depp was at the very top, personable, chatty and sociable with fans.  I don't know if this has anything to do with longevity of acting careers or not, but that's my report.

Cavebear

Yeah.  In the original comics Peter Parker was a wimp.  He just had Spider-strength in his wimpy body.  He was the high school nerd.

That mattered.  Now he is just another musclebound pounder.
Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!

Hydra009

Quote from: Cavebear on February 26, 2017, 01:25:41 PMYeah.  In the original comics Peter Parker was a wimp.  He just had Spider-strength in his wimpy body.  He was the high school nerd.

That mattered.  Now he is just another musclebound pounder.
Yeah, I think they made Spidey supermuscled in the movies as a visual cue to the audience that he's very strong.  But the fact that he's strong, like most of his powerset, is supposed to be concealed - the villains (and the audience) know about it only after he does it.

Most villains wouldn't know what to make of Spidey in their first encounter.  Just some weirdo in red spandex.  Then he crawls up the wall.  You reach for your gun.  Bam, webbing to the face.  Where'd that come from?  You run to your car.  He lifts it off the ground.  Next thing you know, you're in the Brooklyn Detention Complex for a very, very long time.



Plus, Spidey is one of the few waify-looking male superheroes.

Cavebear

Quote from: Hydra009 on February 26, 2017, 01:47:26 PM
Yeah, I think they made Spidey supermuscled in the movies as a visual cue to the audience that he's very strong.  But the fact that he's strong, like most of his powerset, is supposed to be concealed - the villains (and the audience) know about it only after he does it.

Most villains wouldn't know what to make of Spidey in their first encounter.  Just some weirdo in red spandex.  Then he crawls up the wall.  You reach for your gun.  Bam, webbing to the face.  Where'd that come from?  You run to your car.  He lifts it off the ground.  Next thing you know, you're in the Brooklyn Detention Complex for a very, very long time.Never challenge old age.  I knew Spiderman from the start.  Before he could climb walls or had webs.

I remember when he faced Flash in a boxing ring and had to figure out how to knock him out with actually killing him.  It was a gentle "tap".

I had the book where Uncle Ben was killed and Spidey was juts a wrestler...



Plus, Spidey is one of the few waify-looking male superheroes.
Atheist born, atheist bred.  And when I die, atheist dead!