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Extraordinary Claims => Religion General Discussion => Christianity => Topic started by: Blackleaf on December 24, 2017, 04:24:06 PM

Title: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Blackleaf on December 24, 2017, 04:24:06 PM
I was watching a new video by DarkMatter2525 called "The Alt Apostle" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0PepyWE4ug), and it got me thinking just how many of Jesus teaching Christians conveniently ignore. Funny, they profess that they believe that Jesus was the perfect son of God, yet they disagree with (or conveniently reinterpret) nearly everything the "inerrant Word of God" records him saying. I thought it would be a fun idea to list the number of teaching Christians today do not follow.

Just to be clear, I do not mean to imply that choosing not to follow these teachings is a bad thing. To follow Jesus perfectly would result in a person becoming homeless and hungry, and disassociating oneself from family and friends. There's a reason people don't follow Jesus' teachings: because many of them are self-destructive. Also, I am only going to focus on the teachings of Jesus, not any Old Testament laws or anything else from the New Testament, which Christians also conveniently disregard when convenient. So with that out of the way, here's a list of things I thought of.

1. "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called Children of God." Pfft! Nah. We must make war! We must always be at war! War for our independence! War in the Middle East! War around the whole world, twice! War with ourselves! It is God's will (if we win).

2. "Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you." This motherfucker said on the internet dares to insult me, my political party, and/or my beliefs! I shall show him he's wrong by writing a lengthy mass of expletives with my poor spelling and grammar skills!

3. "If you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift." That's okay. I'll just pray about it, and that'll make it okay. I don't need the forgiveness of others; only God. What? You expect me to actually make reparations to earn my sense of peace about my wrongdoing? Get out of here.

4. "Sell everything you have and give it to the poor." You mean you want me to give handouts? No way! If they want money, they should get a job! You expect ME to give away my hard earned money? What are you, a Socialist???

5. "Judge not, lest ye be judged." Huh? What was that? Sorry. I was busy writing an angry comment about how lazy and selfish this new generation is. What a bunch of SJWs Libtards!

6. "Those who visit people in prison visit me." You want me to treat prisoners like people? No way! Prisoners are scum, and they will continue to be scum for the rest of their lives! My tax dollars are wasted giving them free food, shelter, and medical care! They should just be left to rot!

7. "If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; And if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; For you will heap burning coals on his head, And the LORD will reward you." Fuck my enemies! My kindness is reserved for the people I like!

8. "I tell you, do not forgive seven times, but seventy-seven times." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

9. "Do not worry about anything. God will provide all your needs." God helps those who help themselves! Also, what if the next Democratic President is the Anti-Christ? Oh, my God! If we don't rally against the Democrats, the end times will happen! We must do everything we can to make the Biblical prophecies wrong! God is powerless against them! Only we can stop them!

10. "The two greatest comments are these: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your mind, and with all your soul. And the second is like it. Love your neighbor as you love yourself." Don't be silly. The two greatest commandments are don't be gay, and vote Republican!

11. "And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full." We must protect the rights of teachers to force prayer on their students! We must pray before dinner at family gatherings, we must pray at government meetings, we must pray in church for all to hear, because prayer is under attack! Our President better observe the National Day of Prayer!

12. "You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also." Yeah, yeah. I love mercy and all that bullshit, but I kinda like the sound of that eye for an eye thing. That sounds fair to me. Also, I hope those child rapists get raped in prison.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 24, 2017, 08:37:02 PM
Yeah, that pretty much went out the window with Constantine taking over the Church .... particularly the "blessed are the poor" ... has nothing to do with "spirit", cheapskates!
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Mike Cl on December 24, 2017, 10:14:32 PM
Well done, OP.  No wonder Christians are 'christ'ians and not Jesus-arians.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on December 26, 2017, 12:04:39 PM
Quote from: Mike Cl on December 24, 2017, 10:14:32 PM
Well done, OP.  No wonder Christians are 'christ'ians and not Jesus-arians.

I gather that there is some difference between a literal "Jesus" and a "Christ" as a part of some 3-deitistic trinity among Christians.  The concept is vague to me personally, but has great differential meaning in some religious subgroups.

PFFFT!!!!! to both sides.  I don't care except inasmuch as the 2 sides ruin our daily lives with such blither... Go kill each other off and leave the rest of us sensible people is peace.

Sorry, I just really get annoyed at theists screaming about which end of the egg to cut.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 26, 2017, 01:15:47 PM
Quote from: Cavebear on December 26, 2017, 12:04:39 PM
I gather that there is some difference between a literal "Jesus" and a "Christ" as a part of some 3-deitistic trinity among Christians.  The concept is vague to me personally, but has great differential meaning in some religious subgroups.

PFFFT!!!!! to both sides.  I don't care except inasmuch as the 2 sides ruin our daily lives with such blither... Go kill each other off and leave the rest of us sensible people is peace.

Sorry, I just really get annoyed at theists screaming about which end of the egg to cut.

Then be a vegan if you want ;-)  No eggs for you.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Gawdzilla Sama on December 26, 2017, 01:20:51 PM
Never met a Christian.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 26, 2017, 01:25:06 PM
Quote from: Gawdzilla Sama on December 26, 2017, 01:20:51 PM
Never met a Christian.

There is a whole swarm of different Constantinian tribes though.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on December 26, 2017, 05:07:06 PM
I'm occasionally (not often!) asked by a Christian to pray with them, and I always point out that Jesus told us, in no uncertain terms, not to pray in public. That gets me out of having to pray with them, but it doesn't keep them from continuing to pray in public. Oh well, we do what we can. They seem to love being in the spotlight, and praying gets them there most every time.

Good thread Blackleaf! I wonder just which commandments of Jesus they actually do obey?


Here is what Answers in Genesis has to say about it - typical double-speak:

https://answersingenesis.org/contradictions-in-the-bible/should-christians-pray-in-public-or-not/
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: fencerider on December 27, 2017, 09:49:00 PM
I dont know what the diffference between a Paulitarian or a Christian or a Jesusian is, but Blackleaf is hilarious. I think you got it right on... maybe we should add some more hijinks to the list.

Give and it shall be given unto you

If you have two coats and you see that your neighbor has none give him one of your coats.

Vengence is mine...
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: SGOS on December 28, 2017, 08:27:50 AM
A good part of being Christian is pure ego trip centered around being an exemplary good person.  The mechanics of the psychology involved seem to be centered around the notions of Christian/good, Other/bad.  You profess to be a Christian and people automatically place you in the "good" category.  The actual details and expectations of living up to the Christian image are less important than the actual classification, and even overlooked by others as unavoidable slips do to mankind's sinful nature.  You can murder another person and be forgiven, but only if you are a Christian.  If you are not a Christian, there is no forgiveness.  And in my indoctrination, simply not being a Christian is the biggest sin of all, worse than stealing, lying, raping, and killing.  Go directly to Hell.  Do not pass Go.  You are automatic "toast".
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 28, 2017, 12:58:42 PM
Quote from: SGOS on December 28, 2017, 08:27:50 AM
A good part of being Christian is pure ego trip centered around being an exemplary good person.  The mechanics of the psychology involved seem to be centered around the notions of Christian/good, Other/bad.  You profess to be a Christian and people automatically place you in the "good" category.  The actual details and expectations of living up to the Christian image are less important than the actual classification, and even overlooked by others as unavoidable slips do to mankind's sinful nature.  You can murder another person and be forgiven, but only if you are a Christian.  If you are not a Christian, there is no forgiveness.  And in my indoctrination, simply not being a Christian is the biggest sin of all, worse than stealing, lying, raping, and killing.  Go directly to Hell.  Do not pass Go.  You are automatic "toast".

This is an extension of Greco-Roman particularism.  There are Greeks, the rest are Barbarians (savages).  The Latins were barbarians to the Greeks, until the they adopted Greek culture.  As did the Macedonian barbarians before them.  The Latins of course were conveyers of Greek culture, in Latin form, and law & order.  Do what we Romans say (that is the law).  Don't do that, and that is disorder, and we destroy you.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Gawdzilla Sama on December 28, 2017, 06:59:28 PM
Cafeteria Christians.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 28, 2017, 07:00:46 PM
Quote from: Gawdzilla Sama on December 28, 2017, 06:59:28 PM
Cafeteria Christians.

Toga Romans.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Blackleaf on December 29, 2017, 02:29:07 AM
Quote from: SGOS on December 28, 2017, 08:27:50 AM
A good part of being Christian is pure ego trip centered around being an exemplary good person.  The mechanics of the psychology involved seem to be centered around the notions of Christian/good, Other/bad.  You profess to be a Christian and people automatically place you in the "good" category.  The actual details and expectations of living up to the Christian image are less important than the actual classification, and even overlooked by others as unavoidable slips do to mankind's sinful nature.  You can murder another person and be forgiven, but only if you are a Christian.  If you are not a Christian, there is no forgiveness.  And in my indoctrination, simply not being a Christian is the biggest sin of all, worse than stealing, lying, raping, and killing.  Go directly to Hell.  Do not pass Go.  You are automatic "toast".

Hell, when a pastor, priest, or other type of "holy" man is accused of child rape, the church more often rallies around their religious leader and blames the child. I knew a girl who went through that experience. Family values my ass.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Gawdzilla Sama on December 29, 2017, 06:28:07 AM
Quote from: SGOS on December 28, 2017, 08:27:50 AM
A good part of being Christian is pure ego trip centered around being an exemplary good person.  The mechanics of the psychology involved seem to be centered around the notions of Christian/good, Other/bad.  You profess to be a Christian and people automatically place you in the "good" category.  The actual details and expectations of living up to the Christian image are less important than the actual classification, and even overlooked by others as unavoidable slips do to mankind's sinful nature.  You can murder another person and be forgiven, but only if you are a Christian.  If you are not a Christian, there is no forgiveness.  And in my indoctrination, simply not being a Christian is the biggest sin of all, worse than stealing, lying, raping, and killing.  Go directly to Hell.  Do not pass Go.  You are automatic "toast".
Yep, be in the in-group or be hated. It's simpler for people to say they're christian than to live like a Christian.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 06:37:32 AM
Quote from: Blackleaf on December 29, 2017, 02:29:07 AM
Hell, when a pastor, priest, or other type of "holy" man is accused of child rape, the church more often rallies around their religious leader and blames the child. I knew a girl who went through that experience. Family values my ass.

Same as cops, unfortunately.  All authoritarians do it.  Not all church leaders are authoritarians.

Even Gandhi was an ass, sometimes.  And no doubt his followers refused to accept the truth about it.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Mike Cl on December 29, 2017, 09:32:46 AM
Quote from: Gawdzilla Sama on December 29, 2017, 06:28:07 AM
Yep, be in the in-group or be hated. It's simpler for people to say they're christian than to live like a Christian.
And that's true even when a 'christian' can't really tell what it actually means to 'live like a christian'.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: SGOS on December 29, 2017, 10:18:25 AM
Quote from: Mike Cl on December 29, 2017, 09:32:46 AM
And that's true even when a 'christian' can't really tell what it actually means to 'live like a christian'.
I called myself a Christian when I didn't even believe in God.  OK, explanation necessary here.  I was too frightened to call myself anything else, and through some mental gymnastics, I managed to convince myself that not knowing there was NO god, was the same thing as believing there was a God.  Not to mention that silly Trinity thing. Jesus being my savior never made a bit of sense to me, ever.  If anyone was going to save me from Hell, it would ultimately be God.  He didn't need to sacrifice his son; He's God.  He could just save me without the falderal.  Why was the Jesus step necessary at all? 

I don't think I ever prayed to Jesus once.  I always prayed to God.  They are one and the same, no?  Well, sometimes they are and sometimes they are not, apparently, but that makes no sense either.  It's just extra nonsense to believe, that is... IF YOU WANT TO BE A CHRISTIAN.  So, just say you're a Christian.  Who's going to ask you anyway?  If you don't care what a real Christian is, why would anyone else?  They don't know what they are talking about either.  Everyone is going to be happy and they will leave you alone.  Well, you do get the occasional anal retentive fundamentalist who will challenge you if he happens to be in a foul mood. 

Oh the games we play with ourselves.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Gawdzilla Sama on December 29, 2017, 11:06:45 AM
I never claimed to be a Christian. The only time I was ever asked was when someone had already decided I was a bad person if I didn't say the right thing. Other than those few jackasses it never came up.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: SGOS on December 29, 2017, 12:47:11 PM
I was asked one time by a guy I had only known for an hour.  It was issued as a challenge in an intimidating manner.  Out of the blue he asked while pointing his finger at me, "Are you <points finger at me> a Christian?"  I remember wondering how he defined Christian, like was I just a Christian or A REAL CHRISTIAN like him?  I didn't want to answer thinking it was some sort of trap.  I lied, "Yes, I am," in the most intimidating tone I could muster.  I don't think he believed me, but he backed off not wanting to be out Christianed by a better Christian.  I thought to myself, "Fuck You, Asshole."
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 01:20:21 PM
Quote from: SGOS on December 29, 2017, 12:47:11 PM
I was asked one time by a guy I had only known for an hour.  It was issued as a challenge in an intimidating manner.  Out of the blue he asked while pointing his finger at me, "Are you <points finger at me> a Christian?"  I remember wondering how he defined Christian, like was I just a Christian or A REAL CHRISTIAN like him?  I didn't want to answer thinking it was some sort of trap.  I lied, "Yes, I am," in the most intimidating tone I could muster.  I don't think he believed me, but he backed off not wanting to be out Christianed by a better Christian.  I thought to myself, "Fuck You, Asshole."

I have encountered the Southern cultural question once ... "What is your religion?" ... meaning which church do you go to.  I think he would have been shocked if I had said Buddhist.  At the time, I could temporize and gave the church I went to with my wife.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: GSOgymrat on December 29, 2017, 02:07:46 PM
Quote from: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 01:20:21 PM
I have encountered the Southern cultural question once ... "What is your religion?" ... meaning which church do you go to.

I've never been asked "What is your religion?" The question I get is "Where do you go to church?" As an obvious Southerner, Christianity is assumed.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 04:34:56 PM
I've been tempted before to tell people that I worship Anton LaVey (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anton_LaVey)'s God, but I've always chickened out. Christians are too unpredictable, and they can be violent if provoked.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 06:12:32 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 04:34:56 PM
I've been tempted before to tell people that I worship Anton LaVey (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anton_LaVey)'s God, but I've always chickened out. Christians are too unpredictable, and they can be violent if provoked.

My best friend in HS, was interested in LaVey ... but he went to Hell ;-( ... not literally, but in some other respects.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 06:37:02 PM
Well, aren't we all in hell right now?
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 06:41:56 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 06:37:02 PM
Well, aren't we all in hell right now?

I think my friend is in California ... it is warmer there, not like Hel ... the Norse bad place, which is cold, where I am now.

Actually Heaven and Hell are attitudes toward whatever your present situation is.  For a nihilist, you don't get either, you get nothing.

My view is that this is heaven and hell, right here, right now ... it is up to me to have a more positive attitude, but without delusion or drugs.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 06:44:41 PM
Quote from: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 06:41:56 PM
Actually Heaven and Hell are attitudes toward whatever your present situation is.  For a nihilist, you don't get either, you get nothing.
(https://data.whicdn.com/images/123851500/superthumb.jpg)
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 06:49:06 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 06:44:41 PM
(https://data.whicdn.com/images/123851500/superthumb.jpg)

Only if you are using how many hard boiled eggs you can down (burp).

Only rely on nothing, if you are a Buddhist.  But meditation isn't nothing.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 07:01:42 PM
Well, I was nothing before I became something. Then I'll be nothing again after I'm finished being something.

Nothingness rules!
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Munch on December 29, 2017, 07:15:55 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 07:01:42 PM
Well, I was nothing before I became something. Then I'll be nothing again after I'm finished being something.

Nothingness rules!

(https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/kingdomhearts/images/b/be/Xemnas_KHD.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/250?cb=20100930234132)
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 09:04:32 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on December 29, 2017, 07:01:42 PM
Well, I was nothing before I became something. Then I'll be nothing again after I'm finished being something.

Nothingness rules!

It would appear that you only have the ambition to achieve nothing.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Hydra009 on December 30, 2017, 12:45:14 AM
Quote from: GSOgymrat on December 29, 2017, 02:07:46 PM
I've never been asked "What is your religion?" The question I get is "Where do you go to church?" As an obvious Southerner, Christianity is assumed.
Same.  And I was able to answer truthfully without angering them.  I told them the name of a local church that I go to.  What I didn't say was that I only ever go there to vote.  :)
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: GSOgymrat on December 30, 2017, 03:33:35 AM
Quote from: Hydra009 on December 30, 2017, 12:45:14 AM
Same.  And I was able to answer truthfully without angering them.  I told them the name of a local church that I go to.  What I didn't say was that I only ever go there to vote.  :)

If someone I don't know well asks what church I attend I typically reply "I'm not religious" but if I want to skirt the issue I will say "I was raised Methodist", which is true.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on December 30, 2017, 01:20:31 PM
Quote from: Baruch on December 29, 2017, 09:04:32 PM
It would appear that you only have the ambition to achieve nothing.
It certainly would appear so, I suppose. But only I can live my life - you can't live it for me. I simply recognize the obvious when I see it.

What are your ambitions? Are they any better than my ambition to achieve nothing? At least my ambition is attainable. Are yours?
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on December 31, 2017, 01:18:27 AM
Quote from: Unbeliever on December 30, 2017, 01:20:31 PM
It certainly would appear so, I suppose. But only I can live my life - you can't live it for me. I simply recognize the obvious when I see it.

What are your ambitions? Are they any better than my ambition to achieve nothing? At least my ambition is attainable. Are yours?

Attainable?  Not a proper criterion.  I could do anything tomorrow that I set my mind to.  Given a good night's sleep.  That isn't nothin'.

I have seen video of people with handicaps, coping with them, beyond my comprehension ... yet these people do.  Say no to depression.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on January 02, 2018, 03:29:36 PM
I'm not depressed - I'm apathetic. There's a difference.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on January 02, 2018, 06:23:21 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on January 02, 2018, 03:29:36 PM
I'm not depressed - I'm apathetic. There's a difference.

Hit yourself until you feel the pain.  Are you apathetic to pain?
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: trdsf on January 03, 2018, 03:53:02 PM
Quote from: GSOgymrat on December 30, 2017, 03:33:35 AM
If someone I don't know well asks what church I attend I typically reply "I'm not religious" but if I want to skirt the issue I will say "I was raised Methodist", which is true.
The last time I was asked directly, I answered just as directly -- but it's easier to be an out atheist in a Northern urban area than anywhere in the South.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on January 03, 2018, 03:58:35 PM
Quote from: trdsf on January 03, 2018, 03:53:02 PM
The last time I was asked directly, I answered just as directly -- but it's easier to be an out atheist in a Northern urban area than anywhere in the South.

People have lower expectations for "Damn Yankees" ;-)
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: GSOgymrat on January 03, 2018, 04:33:04 PM
Quote from: trdsf on January 03, 2018, 03:53:02 PM
The last time I was asked directly, I answered just as directly -- but it's easier to be an out atheist in a Northern urban area than anywhere in the South.

I don't mind being an out atheist but, at least in my experience, some people want to engage in a big conversation about faith and religion and I'm not always in the mood. Every month or so I get strangers ringing my doorbell promoting their church. When I tell people I'm atheist they often take it as a challenge and typically launch into a first cause argument, e.g. "You live in this beautiful house. Now someone had to build this house, right?" I do my best to be courteous but one time these women just didn't want to stop, even when I said "I am sorry, but I am not going to discuss this topic any further." It is just easier sometimes to smile, nod and let them make false assumptions.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: trdsf on January 03, 2018, 05:07:10 PM
Quote from: GSOgymrat on January 03, 2018, 04:33:04 PM
I don't mind being an out atheist but, at least in my experience, some people want to engage in a big conversation about faith and religion and I'm not always in the mood. Every month or so I get strangers ringing my doorbell promoting their church. When I tell people I'm atheist they often take it as a challenge and typically launch into a first cause argument, e.g. "You live in this beautiful house. Now someone had to build this house, right?" I do my best to be courteous but one time these women just didn't want to stop, even when I said "I am sorry, but I am not going to discuss this topic any further." It is just easier sometimes to smile, nod and let them make false assumptions.
I tell them that they asked me what I believed, not whether I wanted to be preached at, and that I would demand equal time to preach reason at them.  Them using it as an excuse to push their beliefs was the discourteous act, not your shutting them down.

I also haven't had a preacher at my door since I told the last one that a) I work third shift and they just woke me up (it was 10am) and b) they never asked permission to preach at me, and I could tell them in advance that such permission was not forthcoming.  Punctuated by a door slam.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Mike Cl on January 03, 2018, 06:36:57 PM
My solution for when the Nitwits come knocking.  I open the door, say 'No thank you!' and then shut the door.  10 sec. and it's all over.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on January 03, 2018, 06:46:46 PM
Quote from: Mike Cl on January 03, 2018, 06:36:57 PM
My solution for when the Nitwits come knocking.  I open the door, say 'No thank you!' and then shut the door.  10 sec. and it's all over.

I usually answer the door in my Fruit-of-the-Looms ... even scares off cops.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Blackleaf on January 03, 2018, 06:49:19 PM
The evangelists in my area don't speak English very well, so those conversations are pretty short for me. They see my pale skin and immediately assume that there is an insurmountable language barrier. They hand me something that will go right into the trash, and they leave politely with an awkward laugh.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on January 03, 2018, 06:57:24 PM
Quote from: Blackleaf on January 03, 2018, 06:49:19 PM
The evangelists in my area don't speak English very well, so those conversations are pretty short for me. They see my pale skin and immediately assume that there is an insurmountable language barrier. They hand me something that will go right into the trash, and they leave politely with an awkward laugh.

JWs have admitted Hispanics, they have a Hispanic JW meeting hall in my town.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on January 03, 2018, 06:58:04 PM
Quote from: Baruch on January 03, 2018, 06:46:46 PM
I usually answer the door in my Fruit-of-the-Looms ... even scares off cops.
Do they ever ask if that's a banana in your underwear, or are you just glad to see them?
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on January 03, 2018, 10:42:26 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on January 03, 2018, 06:58:04 PM
Do they ever ask if that's a banana in your underwear, or are you just glad to see them?

Some women like men in uniform ... but I am not like that ;-)
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on January 27, 2018, 02:16:53 PM
Quote from: Baruch on January 03, 2018, 10:42:26 PM
Some women like men in uniform ... but I am not like that ;-)

Better to keep the banana in your ear, so you can pretend not to hear...
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on January 27, 2018, 02:18:48 PM
You should never put anything in your ear, except your elbow.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on January 27, 2018, 02:26:15 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on January 27, 2018, 02:18:48 PM
You should never put anything in your ear, except your elbow.

Eh?  Sorry, I have an elbow in my ear!  Seriously, have you ever read a Q-Tip package?  The one thing I thought they were supposed to be used for, you shouldn't!
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on January 27, 2018, 03:18:32 PM
Quote from: Cavebear on January 27, 2018, 02:26:15 PM
Eh?  Sorry, I have an elbow in my ear!  Seriously, have you ever read a Q-Tip package?  The one thing I thought they were supposed to be used for, you shouldn't!

Damn the lawyers!  Full courtroom ahead. - Judge Farragut.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on January 27, 2018, 03:21:22 PM
Quote from: Baruch on January 27, 2018, 03:18:32 PM
Damn the lawyers!  Full courtroom ahead. - Judge Farragut.

Te product was marketed by weasels and the warnings on the box were written by different weasels...
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on January 27, 2018, 03:23:35 PM
Quote from: Cavebear on January 27, 2018, 02:26:15 PM
Eh?  Sorry, I have an elbow in my ear!  Seriously, have you ever read a Q-Tip package?  The one thing I thought they were supposed to be used for, you shouldn't!
People used to call into the Dr. Dean Edell show and complain about belly-button stink, and he'd ask them if they clean their navels with Q-tips. When they invariably said yes, they do, he'd tell them how cotton bits would come off the Q-tip and fester in there, and the bacteria was causing the stink. I've never used the things for anything since then.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on January 27, 2018, 03:28:05 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on January 27, 2018, 03:23:35 PM
People used to call into the Dr. Dean Edell show and complain about belly-button stink, and he'd ask them if they clean their navels with Q-tips. When they invariably said yes, they do, he'd tell them how cotton bits would come off the Q-tip and fester in there, and the bacteria was causing the stink. I've never used the things for anything since then.

So your head is turning into a wax-works at Madame Tussaud?
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: trdsf on January 27, 2018, 07:40:13 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on January 27, 2018, 03:23:35 PM
People used to call into the Dr. Dean Edell show and complain about belly-button stink, and he'd ask them if they clean their navels with Q-tips. When they invariably said yes, they do, he'd tell them how cotton bits would come off the Q-tip and fester in there, and the bacteria was causing the stink. I've never used the things for anything since then.
I use 'em for plastic welding fluid (if I'm working on a large area) and certain kinds of paint, and for testing ink colors.  Basically, they're useful for everything except the stuff people think they're supposed to be used for.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 04:49:18 AM
Quote from: trdsf on January 27, 2018, 07:40:13 PM
I use 'em for plastic welding fluid (if I'm working on a large area) and certain kinds of paint, and for testing ink colors.  Basically, they're useful for everything except the stuff people think they're supposed to be used for.

They are also good for applying wood glue to small areas.  Not much other purpose.  Now I have to figure out what to do with the other 499 in the box...
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Gawdzilla Sama on February 02, 2018, 08:54:10 AM
Have we decided which Christ we're putting back into which Christianity?
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 12:05:16 PM
Quote from: Gawdzilla Sama on February 02, 2018, 08:54:10 AM
Have we decided which Christ we're putting back into which Christianity?

Listening to Jesus Christ Superstar now, as it were.  As far as Christ being an original goes, look to Mithra.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on February 02, 2018, 12:23:25 PM
Quote from: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 12:05:16 PM
Listening to Jesus Christ Superstar now, as it were.  As far as Christ being an original goes, look to Mithra.

Older than that, and with many fathers, not just one.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 12:43:37 PM
Quote from: Baruch on February 02, 2018, 12:23:25 PM
Older than that, and with many fathers, not just one.

Fer sure, dood!  The earliest wasn't Mithra.  But he pre-dated Heysus.  The important thing to realize is that the christian text is way late and copied from everyone else.  So there isn't a dime (or 30) of value in anything in there.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on February 02, 2018, 12:45:59 PM
Quote from: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 12:43:37 PM
Fer sure, dood!  The earliest wasn't Mithra.  But he pre-dated Heysus.  The important thing to realize is that the christian text is way late and copied from everyone else.  So there isn't a dime (or 30) of value in anything in there.

All good artists are plagiarists.  But not all plagiarists are good.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 12:57:58 PM
Quote from: Baruch on February 02, 2018, 12:45:59 PM
All good artists are plagiarists.  But not all plagiarists are good.

That's like saying that mammals have hair, whales are mammals, therefore all mammals are whales.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on February 02, 2018, 12:59:13 PM
Quote from: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 12:57:58 PM
That's like saying that mammals have hair, whales are mammals, therefore all mammals are whales.

I guess you never cribbed any notes for a test, nor looked up anything in Wikipedia.  You went back to the Stone Age on every question, and worked forward, to prove your originality?
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 01:17:03 PM
Quote from: Baruch on February 02, 2018, 12:59:13 PM
I guess you never cribbed any notes for a test, nor looked up anything in Wikipedia.  You went back to the Stone Age on every question, and worked forward, to prove your originality?

Actually, much of my historical interest resides there.  And no, I never cribbed notes for tests.  I just listened to lectures and read the books.  I do check wikipedia for facts sometimes.  Confirmation of old memories is good and sometimes there is new information.

Does that disturb you?
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Baruch on February 02, 2018, 01:21:48 PM
Quote from: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 01:17:03 PM
Actually, much of my historical interest resides there.  And no, I never cribbed notes for tests.  I just listened to lectures and read the books.  I do check wikipedia for facts sometimes.  Confirmation of old memories is good and sometimes there is new information.

Does that disturb you?

There is good X and bad X ... as I said.  I see nothing wrong in what you just said.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 01:28:25 PM
Quote from: Baruch on February 02, 2018, 01:21:48 PM
There is good X and bad X ... as I said.  I see nothing wrong in what you just said.

You said otherwise in the previous post.  Very Trumpian; attack, deny, then infer back.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Unbeliever on February 02, 2018, 02:09:32 PM
Quote from: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 12:05:16 PM
Listening to Jesus Christ Superstar now, as it were.  As far as Christ being an original goes, look to Mithra.
I really like the music in that! Heard it the first time when I was still a Christian, way back in my teen years, at the home of the local youth leader of my church. It actually made me think more deeply about the religion.
Title: Re: Putting the Christ Back in Christian
Post by: Cavebear on February 02, 2018, 02:14:38 PM
Quote from: Unbeliever on February 02, 2018, 02:09:32 PM
I really like the music in that! Heard it the first time when I was still a Christian, way back in my teen years, at the home of the local youth leader of my church. It actually made me think more deeply about the religion.

I admire the story it tells, though not the deeper meaning of religion.  In college, I listened to it so often I won bets by always knowing the next line (though the duplicate lines were verboten).